OMG ROFLMAO JUST GOT OWNED

OMG ROFLMAO JUST GOT OWNED

Got Troll?

ALL WE NEED IS LOVE

seriously though, people are weird and funny, and if people were more like me, there would be no crazy internet post arguments. So what I’m saying is.. I’m glad people aren’t more like me, then I would have nothing to read.

I like to misuse commas

Give yourselves a hand. This MUST be on Stumble because of these ridiculous comments. I like it!

I just personally want to thank each and everyone of you for brightening up my evening. There is nothing like a bunch of assholes arguing over Whoppers/cheesy teeth having fancy lads from the great country of Brit over absolutely nothing important at all.

Your humbled reader

The choka.

I think this was submitted to stumble just because of the comments, and i greatly appreciate that. hahaha

“lol… I love the way stumble unites people everywhere to laugh at people arguing over something as ridiculous as this :p good times…”

yeah! good times right?!
*bookmarked!*

haha fonetics

I win.

LOL love all the comments it looks like all the fans of my site are just as retarded as I am.

If new codes come out or I find something somewhere online I will update this post by putting a link on the bottom of the article.

Stay classy internets

Roughly I grabbed the frightened teen, bending her over the back of the couch. The bassinet was nearly knocked over by her desperate flailing. Shoving my hands into her waistband, I gave a quick yank downwards and….
Oops… sorry… wrong thread.

1.Americans eat more sugar and artificial sweeteners than any other people on earth.(FACT)

2.Americans also experience more episodes of acute hunger each day than any other people on earth – many people eat 11 times a day(FACT)

3.And Americans do less physical work per day than any other nation.(FACT)

and yet another fact for you :
74.1% of Americans are over weight and roll in at no.9 in the world fattest country’s list.

so im guessing all them FREE bk whoppers gotta take there toll .

I await your comments.

Limey:
Tree-Hugging-Vegan-faggot.

Burger King RULES!

LMAO!

74.1% of all Americans are overweight… (FACT)

92.6% of all Brits are GAY… (FACT)

Due to the fact that 98.9% of all British women have the SNAGGLE-TOOTH!… (FACT)

And True Brit….

Who said ANYTHING about wanking over a picture of my friends mom?

What I said was:

I “DID” her while eating a BIG MAC off her plump ass!

hehehe… love stumble…

life is a highway, i’m gonna ride it all night long…
damn it…

JUST GO BUY A BIG MAC!

Spent Rod with a city like San Francisco that offers gay and lesbian ONLY hotels and more than 70% of the citys population being gay or lesbian it makes me wonder how many more states/city hide the fact that there in the closet or is this just you “COMING OUT” ???

I would also like to see were you get your so called “FACTs” from.Im sure you if cheque out my stats you’ll find there correct and thats why you seem to be a little worried about your sexuality……..no matter im sure your closet homosexual tendency will shine some day.

Oh and Burger King as for Tree-Hugging-Vegan-faggot.

Let me tell you something, i cut trees down for a living,love a good steak(not as big as you yanks like though but then thats why your so fat) and am married with 2 children.
So i think that just about covers your comment……..im now thinking are you yet another “closet homo” ?

Limey Limey Limey….. LMFAO!

You kill me man… (or should I say “young lady”?)

I have watched many episodes of Monty Python and Faulty Towers… “IF”… I say “IF” I was British… I “TOO” would be a flaming homosexual… The British women typically make Hillary Clinton look hot!

Everyone knows that homosexuality was started in England… Then you guys spread it to the French… And it simply snowballed from there to all the other countries with butt-ugly women. (And as any educated person knows: The homosexuals in San Fransisco are simply English IMMIGRANTS.)

I have NO issues with my sexuality… I assure you… Other than that ONE time in college when I attended a COCK FIGHT… But that shouldn’t count… I was drunk.

As for your wife and MY kids… Once again… I WAS DRUNK!

So lets settle this once and for all…

The English are chubby, snaggle-toothed flaming homosexuals…

The French smell…

The Italians seem to be chicken shits…

And the Americans enjoy their Whoppers…

Hmmm…. I think I’ll pick America.

GOD BLESS AMERICA… And GOD BLESS WHOPPERS!

PS… From the SIZE of your queen and the LOOKS of Camilla (Prince Charles snaggle-toothed, scary-assed girlfriend) I would venture to guess they have partook in MORE than the occasional WHOPPER!

(your turn) Limey Fruitcake

Nah…

Still MY turn…

Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest BRITISH children?
A: Ask Limey’s mother.

Q: How can you tell if your BRITISH wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

Q: What do you call a BRITISH prostitute with a runny nose?
A: Full.

Q: What’s the difference between oral sex & anal sex?
A: Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your BRITISH hole weak.

Q: If your BRITISH wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?
A: Made her chain too long.

Q: Do you know why BRITISH women fake orgasm?
A: Because BRITISH men fake foreplay.

Q: A BRITISH woman of 35 thinks of having children. What does a BRITISH man of 35 think of?
A: Dating children.

Q: What did Limey’s sperm cell say to the other sperm cell?
A: How do we find an egg in all of this shit?

Q. How do you find a BRITISH blonde in the dark?
A. Pleasing!

Q. How do the little BRITISH boys in England know when it is bedtime?
A. When the big hand touches the little hand…

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were sitting in a bar, drinking, and discussing how stupid their wives were.

The Irishman says, “I tell you, my wife is so stupid. Last week she went to the supermarket and bought $300 worth of meat because it was on sale, and we don’t even have a fridge to keep it in.”

The Scotsman agrees that she sounds pretty stupid, but says his wife is more stupid. “Just last week, she went out and spent $17,000 on a new car,” he laments, “and she doesn’t even know how to drive!”

The Englishman nods sagely, and agrees that these two woman sound like they both walked through the stupid forest and got hit by every branch.

However, he still thinks his wife is dumber.

“Ah, it kills me every time I think of it,” he chuckles, “my wife left to go on a trip to Greece. I watched her packing her bag, and she must have put about 100 condoms in there and she doesn’t even have a dick!”

So, uh.

Can anyone take their dicks out of each other’s mouths for a second and tell me if this actually works?

All this wanking makes me want a burger.

Spent Rod i have to say i take my hat off to your literacy skills and your grasp of the ENGLISH language that for the record thanks to us brits you are able to do, i mean if it wasn’t for us you’d probably be talking and writing german,but thats another thread.

Lets see in light of your failure to elect a proper President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice that Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. (Except Utah, which she does not fancy LoL.) Your new prime minister (The Right Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up “revocation” in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up “aluminium”. Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter ‘U’ will be reinstated in words such as ‘favour’ and ‘neighbour’, skipping the letter ‘U’ is nothing more than laziness on your part. Likewise, you will learn to spell ‘doughnut’ without skipping half the letters. You will end your love affair with the letter ‘Z’ (pronounced ‘zed’ not ‘zee’). You will learn that the suffix ‘burgh is pronounced ‘burra’ e.g. Edinburgh. You are welcome to respell Pittsburgh as ‘Pittsberg’ if you can’t cope with correct pronunciation. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up “vocabulary”. Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as “like” and “you know” is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up “interspersed”. There will be no more ‘bleeps’ in the Jerry Springer show. If you’re not old enough to cope with bad language then you shouldn’t have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary then you won’t have to use bad language as often.

2. There is no such thing as “US English”. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter ‘u’.

3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn’t that hard. English accents are not limited to Cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). You will also have to learn how to understand regional accents – Scottish dramas such as “Taggart” will no longer be broadcast with subtitles. While we’re talking about regions, you must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is “Devon”. If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become “shires” e.g. Texasshire, Floridashire, Louisianashire.

4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. Hollywood will be required to cast English actors to play English characters. British sit-coms such as “Men Behaving Badly” or “Red Dwarf” will not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy American audience who can’t cope with the humour of occasional political in-correctness.

5. You should relearn your original national anthem, “God Save The Queen”, but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

6. You should stop playing American “football”. There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American “football” is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays “American” football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American “football”, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US rugby sevens side by 2005. You should stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the ‘World Series’ for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls’ game called “rounders” which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.

7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear weapons if they give you any merde. The 97.85% of you who were not aware that there is a world outside your borders should count yourselves lucky. The Russians have never been the bad guys. “Merde” is French for “Shit”. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because we don’t believe you are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you will require a permit if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called “Indecisive Day”.

9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren’t even French, they are Belgian though 97.85% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called “crisps”. Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and flat. Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself.

12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all, it is lager. From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be referred to as “beer”, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as “Lager”.

The substances formerly known as “American Beer” will henceforth be referred to as “Near-Frozen Gnats’ Urine”, with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will be referred to as “Weak Near-Frozen Gnats’ Urine”. This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.

13. From December 1st the UK will harmonise petrol (or “Gasoline” as you will be permitted to keep calling it until April 1st 2005) prices with the former USA. The UK will harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the Former USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices roughly $6/US gallon – get used to it).

14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you’re not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you’re not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you’re not grown up enough to handle a gun.

15. Please tell us who the fuck killed JFK. It’s been driving us crazy.

Tax collectors from Her Majesty’s Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).

I think that just about covers it.

Hope to hear from you soon “BUD”.

The Limey.